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Can I….. make music?
The short answer is no… or not yet.
The story begins in around 30 yeras ago when I went to demoparties in first years and shortly realized that I couldn’t create anything at all. (but I desired to do that). (That’s why I chose party organizing and it seemed the infodesk was perfect for me, but that’s another story). However that feeling that creating something was buried deep inside me.
Now back to the present times… 2 weeks ago I surfing on internet and saw a video by Devin Townsend (who is everybody’s favourite Disney princess, and we should protect him at all cost!), after that something shifted inside me and decided that I wanna learn that skill. Because nobody born that way that he/she knows how can make music. The following day I downloaded one of the program, tons of VSTi, and bought a Korg nanoKEY Studio. When I have spare time and have a right mood, I play with it. But for now I’m in a preparing period, and I know that my journey will be veeeery long (maybe years) until I upload my first song on the internet.
I analized myself that what happened in my teenage years when I entered the demoscene. My friends created so many things (music, graphic, coding) and I didn’t, because I wasn’t a competitive type of person. I didn’t want that e.g. 300 random sceners flame my first music or watching music compos without my music (just because there was prejury and my music wasn’t good enough), plus I was a bit introvert that time, I knew that I cound’t bear it.
If I remove that thing from the equation that’s the perfect reason and the purpose for me. Making music without the fear from getting critics from my friends or random ppl.
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How do I measure my progress in English language?
In March I realized that totally forget to understand in English. Because I read some story in that language and hardly I didn’t catch at all what is all about the article.
Then, after Revision 2025 demoparty I wrote a blogpost about how furious, heartbreaking am I that some „demosceners” used A.I at the democompos. During the writing the words didn’t come to me easily, I mixed Past Simple(!) with other tenses… so I needed to say to myself that my English is broken. 😨
But I wanted to do something about it, and in month I found out what kind of learning method is good for me. OK, the best would be go to the language school and learn there, but now I don’t have an opportunity to do that. Until then, I thought that reading in English would best for me because I would see tons of good sentences how should I use the grammar properly in every degree (e.g. B1-C1 in CEFR)
I wanted to make stronger my reading skills so I started to read Masters of Doom (I had it on my E-book for about 10 years and didn’t have the courage to read it).. After many pages my head was in pain, I got angry, I got a nausea in my stomach and I don’t undestand why were I reading slowly… I have to look the word’s meaning almost every 2 sentences. –> this was too much for me in this degree (C1-C2) 😣
Solution
So, I needed to cut back the gradient and made the reading easier. I knew for years that there were easy reading stories and Factfiles in Oxford Bookworms Library, so I started to buy those books. And I bought paper flashcards in every degree (just in case from A1 to C1), and I learned again from the beginning. I didn’t want that there were holes in my knowledge I wanted stable base that I could build my understanding
Measurement
After I started to read and learn flashcards I felt something was missing. I needed to measure my progress. E.g. how many pages do I read in which degree? how many pages do I read weekly? How many books have I done in English? So the solution for that I made a little statistics for those questions. I can say it was very fun to make and collecting those datas. Of course during those readings I knew many famous ppl life (e.g. Steve Jobs, Leonardo da Vinci, Stephen Hawking)
I collected all the data and I can say that already I have read 500+ pages in English (I won’t say that which degree, I want to keep this info to myself). I got inspired and motivated to read more and if I think well I can go back to Masters of Doom and later Scenes from a Memory within a year. That’s the whole point for me. And of course I want to talk with my demoscene friends. 😊
Ezeket is érdemes megnézni
Can I….. make music?
A.I and the demoscene
There is hope (A.I in the demoscene)
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A.I and the demoscene
First of all I would like to apologize, because I don’t use my English skills in daily, and could be rusty… and I have almost 22 month little girl, so my brain often too tired, but I’ll try my best.
In August 2023 after Assembly demoparty I saw something strange on Facebook. It looked like somebody using A.I. on Future Crew – Second Reality. It was a bit creepy to me and suddenly I got nausea, and not from that I couldn’t sleep properly for 1-2 month (8 hours of sleep without interruption). I couldn’t believe my eyes. I was dissapointed and heartbroken.
For you, who don’t know me, Hello! I’m Vicky, I was a party oragnizer in several demopartys (mostly Hungarian and German) from 2000 to 2019. In my early years in that creative community I realized somehow I just couldn’t make anything. No music, no graphics, and of course I couldn’t code… (still don’t). But I was watching compos with awe, my jaw dropped and sometimes I couldn’t believe my eyes what I saw on the big screen it was massive eyecandy for me. That my cool friends what can do in 256 bytes, in 64k, with old computer like C64 and Amiga. Limitation boost the creativity and also it affected me during the demopartys, it helped me to find my „creative beingness”. (I usually plan my life in parties with my friends)
Early this year, in January I saw on Demoscene server in #general that the demoscene and the A.I are in the same sentence and coulnd’t believe my eyes that it is a hot topic. HOW? and WHY? Why isn’t just ban all A.I products in the compos? Doesn’t make sense for me. Even there are some voices that saying „Ignore the AI haters because the day is not far off when they too will use it.” OK, but if that is the case they will liquidate the foundation of the demoscene: the creativity, the aestetics, joyful competitions, and the friendships. Because I’m not sure that we can compare that prod that they make in months with someone who just write 10-15 words for A.I.’s prompt. I know that demoparty’s audience is not stupid, it value the true, competent, hard working creations. At least I hope.
My worst nightmare has came true, Revision demoparty had some work that containtains some A.I. works. I was speechless, and I couldn’t confront that it can happen with this community. That’s why I write this post, because I feel that I can’t take it anymore…. this is nail in the demoscene’s coffin. Ok, we say that the demoscene is dead, but this time it will really will die if we don’t do something about it.
If something miracle happen to me and making music in 3-4 years, I wouldn’t enter for a competition in demoparty or I woulnd’t let my daughter to do that too. Because as a newbie can’t compete with some massive machine.
So my conclusion is that I don’t wanna organise demopartys that let this A.I thing happens in their competions, because this isn’t in my values so it seems I won’t go back to have partying as an Infodesk orga in Revision…. :/
Ezeket is érdemes megnézni
Can I….. make music?
There is hope (A.I in the demoscene)
How do I measure my progress in English language?
